I want to transport you to another time and place. Close your eyes and imagine. Wait, you can't close your eyes and read. Keep your eyes open and envision. A cold winter's night, a warm house filled with the scent of something fabulous cooking. When in walks a husband, it might even be my husband.
Husband-"I saw a dead penguin on the side of the road driving to work today."
Wife-"It was a skunk."
Husband-"No, it was a penguin. It was huge, and not another animal. It was a penguin."
Wife-"We are in Utah not Antartica, or wherever penguins live, it was not a penguin."
Husband-"It was, right there at the point of the mountain, a dead penguin. I have a witness. He saw it too when we were carpooling."
Wife-"I seriously think if there were a missing penguin somewhere it would have been reported."
Husband-"Maybe there are a tribe of wild penguins roaming the valleys of Utah."
Wife-"I am sure there are. They are holed up in a secret compound with Ligers as their security."
Husband-"There is no such thing as a Liger."
Wife-"But there is a tribe of penguins shopping at Walmart right now?"
Husband-"Penguins prefer Target."
And how can you argue with that? So don't be surprised if you see "Penguin X-ing" signs on the freeway from now on.
Also, I couldn't help thinking of Billy Madison.